Inviting someone else into a relationship can turn out to be a disaste
Inviting someone else to a relationship to "inject energy is not always positive. It becomes exhausting if the parties involved are not clear
- 19:07 hrs
The issue with dating a pansexual person, who is neither homosexual nor heterosexual, but is attracted to the person regardless of gender, or being polyamorous seems to complicate things. However, it goes down to "what are both of you looking for."
On this subject, one of the readers writes to Slate and asks the following: My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year "Tom" is pansexual, which has never been a problem (I'm a straight woman). However, the night we met, he told me that he had dated a straight friend, "Brandon," who rejected him, and this situation created a problem. Tom is in love with Brandon. On a few occasions, Tom said that he was ready to talk to his parents about Brandon and hoped he was his boyfriend, but Brandon told him the sexual relationship was only going to happen once and asked him not to say anything. Instead of backing down, Tom texted Brandon to join the relationship and tries to hang at the places he frequents. On some occasions, he invites him to hang out with us, making me want to throw in the towel. He even asks to use my cell phone to dial him from an unknown number, hoping he will answer.
You are not giving us an argument in favor of Tom, and it seems that it is time to back down. The distraction called (New Energy Relation "NRE") usually energizes the relationship, but in this case, it's doing the opposite. It seems that your partner is in love with Brandon.
Also, Tom is not respecting Brandon's decision. He is harassing him. Besides, he broke the agreement they reached, in which Tom would not talk about the relationship.
These are all red flags that question the viability of the relationship and Tom's character. He is imposing himself on someone who is not interested in generating a link.
Stoya and Rich recommend that she writes a list of positive things from the relationship and then evaluate whether to continue within the relationship.
With information from Slate
Traducción: Valentina K . Yanes