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Six "romantic" behaviors that are toxic

Romantic attitudes and behaviors, but are warning signs of toxic people

  • REDACCIÓN
  • 17/06/2020
  • 12:41 hrs
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Six romantic behaviors that are toxic
Six "romantic" behaviors that are toxic (Photo: Pexels)

Although there is a higher percentage of people who want or are looking for someone affectionate and attentive, they wish a more formal relationship. Someone committed to the connection, however many times, the movies or commercials teach or encourage to admire and idealize  "romantic gestures." Still, these behaviors that seem to be for love may be more toxic attitudes.So that later you are not surprised that your prince charming is becoming the villain of the story, pay close attention and if you can run if he presents any of these six apparently "romantic" attitudes.

1. Expressing affection and deep love very hastily

Meeting a person who expresses their feelings to you at an early stage, may at some point feel like a relief or a lucky event. However, when they declare their eternal love and tell you that you are their soul mate or the girl they have waiting for, the best thing you could do is to back off a little, since this behavior is one of the most common and frequent by abusers, narcissists, and compulsive controllers.

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Bear in mind that this does not mean they are deceiving you, they may think that they love you. However, they do not know you, nor do they know your defects. When something happens, they did not contemplate within their imaginary of perfection; they will act differently; it could become aggressive or intense. And this is not the worst of the situation if you did not change to meet the wishes and expectations of the other to the point of no longer recognizing you. It is essential to know that building love requires interest, time, care, patience, and communication.

2. From the beginning, they will tell you very personal things


It may seem that if you have an in-depth conversation on the first date, he connected with you immediately. As if this connection was so good that's why he was not afraid to tell you everything about his parents, his family, and even his trauma, it is crucial to keep in mind that if the conversation reaches a point where an ex appears.

The person speaks ill or sarcastically about their ex-relationship; he may remain resentful or even maintain a sentimental bond that will not let him continue a new relationship. You may not be in the ideal place to start bonding with him.

Read: ”The strategy to live with my abuser is submission"

3. He always wants your attention


Of course, it will always be right that at the beginning of a relationship, there is the detail of constant messages and abundant flirting. It will always be better than those who answer you after several days and respond with a "haha." Still, there is a thin line between constant interest and demand for time, and perhaps you can not give back to what the person can respond with anger or despair; if so, it would be more convenient to go back.

4. He wants to be with you always


He always wants to be with you, at first, it's beautiful, but later you will need a space for yourself when you are with your partner all day and night, the relationship can become more prone to toxic attitudes. If your partner gets angry because you want time for you, it is clear that it is a red signal. It is necessary to take into account that each one needs their space and that your partner cannot make you feel bad. Relationships should not decay in the manipulation of emotions or fear, and it is best not to let this happen.

5. Is too overprotective


Some people go from protection to overprotection and worse to possession, that is, believing the other belongs to you. At first, he will say loving phrases like "You are mine only" or "I want you just for me," but this may be a small clue of what unhealthy behavior would be. These attitudes could lead to jealousy that would undoubtedly damage the relationship. Your partner is a controller; if at any time, you have to defend your behavior or innocent actions, want to impose rules, surveillance on your social networks, or even your phone.

6. They promise the sun and the moon


He makes promises like "I will never leave you" or "I would never hurt you" in reality, there is nothing wrong with these phrases. However, if they are from people who tend to be dramatic, they promise you things that at some point in time of the relationship will end up happening or doing it.

That's why it will always be better to pay attention to a person's actions rather than words; you have to realize how much the person does what he says if he always promises you, but doesn't do anything take it as an alarm signal.

Finally, be clear that a stable relationship is built with time and communication and that there are behaviors that we have romanticized. True romantic gestures are others, such as those who listen to you, respect your independence, accept your qualities, and support you.

Traduccion: Valentina K. Yanes